I can't get close to people offline anymore (other than my family, and by that I mean my husband and kids, not my family of origin).
My bluntness has something to do with it, I know...I've overheard people say "Did she really just say that?" Younger people tend to be able to accept my communication style, but now that I'm over 40, I don't have the opportunity to meet younger people, and they would shy away simply because of my age. And with people of my own age, I too feel like I am imposing.
Recognition is also a huge issue for me. I can't identify the parents of children in my daughter's class, even though she has been in the same class (single-grade school) for six years now- it's clear that the parents easily recognise me, but I suppose that with the fact that each time I meet them is like the first time, they think I'm more standoffish than I am.
And of course, "the tainted blessing, stubborn curse" has a great deal to do with it. I have trouble caring, even though I am lonely.
I wish I would meet a poet- in fact, I know that most of them also tend towards depression. It's difficult, because I'm many miles from any large town.
(It always seems to me that I blog in your comments, which also makes me feel as though I'm imposing, but my communication style only allows me to compare myself with you.)
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My bluntness has something to do with it, I know...I've overheard people say "Did she really just say that?" Younger people tend to be able to accept my communication style, but now that I'm over 40, I don't have the opportunity to meet younger people, and they would shy away simply because of my age. And with people of my own age, I too feel like I am imposing.
Recognition is also a huge issue for me. I can't identify the parents of children in my daughter's class, even though she has been in the same class (single-grade school) for six years now- it's clear that the parents easily recognise me, but I suppose that with the fact that each time I meet them is like the first time, they think I'm more standoffish than I am.
And of course, "the tainted blessing, stubborn curse" has a great deal to do with it. I have trouble caring, even though I am lonely.
I wish I would meet a poet- in fact, I know that most of them also tend towards depression. It's difficult, because I'm many miles from any large town.
(It always seems to me that I blog in your comments, which also makes me feel as though I'm imposing, but my communication style only allows me to compare myself with you.)