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+/- upped my antidepressants again. Intrusive thoughts were refusing to sit down and shut up, and I just don't want to have to deal with that bullshit at the moment. I'll have another go over the summer.
+ my magic wheels have been returned, and the one that was broken is fixed.
- unfortunately, the one that was working is comprehensively fucked. (Once I have made this post, my job is to e-mail them a photo going "er, realise I should've checked this over in the shop, but.")
+ went to a close-up magic competition at which Awesome Housemate C was performing. C was awesome, and so was Sweet Italian Queermo, and honestly the other Italian was also very sweet, but he was flustered and my table was a tough audience (we were all knackered), so.
- of the four competitors, it was Microaggressions Douchebro who won. This pisses me off because (a) he was not the most competent performer of those present; (b) he was shit at people with non-Anglo names; (c) he made a really shitty joke about autism; (d) he misgendered me and didn't bother asking my name (because I'd made an arch remark about point (b), I assume, and he didn't want to deal with having to call me Stanislaw); (e) he asked if he could touch my wrist, took hold of my wrist, then started making jokes about being on the Sex Offenders' Register; (f) honestly I am probably forgetting some of the other shit he did; (g) it was very, VERY noticeable that it was the old white Anglo guy who won, not the more competent Young Italian Queermo or the more competent Awesome Housemate C (who is neither a dude nor white).
+ I do also have a cushion and backrest for my wheelchair, FINALLY.
- I should've gone for the narrower backrest; and it only bloody takes imperial rather than metric allen keys (where the rest of the chair takes metric)
+ I got to see Awesome Housemate C again; wasn't expecting that to happen until after Easter.
+ I sent off my outline for my lit review, so far, to my supervisor; I got back a bunch of feedback today, and skimmed it before heading out, and I'm actually going to implement (some of) it this evening before going to sleep.
and it is at this point that I decide to bump it up to a net 10 good things...
+ I am really, really enjoying my current pulpy fantasy. So, so much. (Lisa Shearin, for the interested: it is incredibly, incredibly pulpy. It's first-person; the perspective character is an elven investigator with a family in the, ah, imports-exports business
+ I wrote a big long organise-y e-mail when the thought occurred to me, and created illustrative examples, rather than flapping uselessly at it.
+ I responded promptly to another e-mail that required actual brain from me.
+ I ate a lot of really, really tasty food. (Stem ginger ice-cream with pear and wild berries crumble! Sweet potato houmous!)
+ ... and if we ever leave a legacy/it's that we loved each other well: yes, thank you, Indigo Girls, that will do nicely as something for me to aim for. (... and so we're okay; we're fine...)
+ I have wonderful, wonderful friends, who keep an eye on me and nudge me about self-care and generally look after me.
+ Other Housemates have all left for the break, i.e. I have the place to myself, i.e. it's actually okay for me to listen to music on the big speakers according to my (currently somewhat disastrous) sleep-cycle, rather than faffing around with headphones (because of the vagaries of my set-up, this involves crawling around underneath my desk).
+ I have got the kitchen into a state such that my bedder cannot reasonably have a snit about that tomorrow (not that this will necessarily stop her), including washing up after Other Housemates (ergo I feel very virtuous).
+ oh, go on, have another: my ridiculously fancy cologne (gift of boything), which I feel a little silly about loving this much but there we go, has been cheering me up all day.
+ ... I'm surprised every time I realise how well this exercise works, in terms of refocussing me on positives and reminding me about good & cheerful things in my life.
+ my magic wheels have been returned, and the one that was broken is fixed.
- unfortunately, the one that was working is comprehensively fucked. (Once I have made this post, my job is to e-mail them a photo going "er, realise I should've checked this over in the shop, but.")
+ went to a close-up magic competition at which Awesome Housemate C was performing. C was awesome, and so was Sweet Italian Queermo, and honestly the other Italian was also very sweet, but he was flustered and my table was a tough audience (we were all knackered), so.
- of the four competitors, it was Microaggressions Douchebro who won. This pisses me off because (a) he was not the most competent performer of those present; (b) he was shit at people with non-Anglo names; (c) he made a really shitty joke about autism; (d) he misgendered me and didn't bother asking my name (because I'd made an arch remark about point (b), I assume, and he didn't want to deal with having to call me Stanislaw); (e) he asked if he could touch my wrist, took hold of my wrist, then started making jokes about being on the Sex Offenders' Register; (f) honestly I am probably forgetting some of the other shit he did; (g) it was very, VERY noticeable that it was the old white Anglo guy who won, not the more competent Young Italian Queermo or the more competent Awesome Housemate C (who is neither a dude nor white).
+ I do also have a cushion and backrest for my wheelchair, FINALLY.
- I should've gone for the narrower backrest; and it only bloody takes imperial rather than metric allen keys (where the rest of the chair takes metric)
+ I got to see Awesome Housemate C again; wasn't expecting that to happen until after Easter.
+ I sent off my outline for my lit review, so far, to my supervisor; I got back a bunch of feedback today, and skimmed it before heading out, and I'm actually going to implement (some of) it this evening before going to sleep.
and it is at this point that I decide to bump it up to a net 10 good things...
+ I am really, really enjoying my current pulpy fantasy. So, so much. (Lisa Shearin, for the interested: it is incredibly, incredibly pulpy. It's first-person; the perspective character is an elven investigator with a family in the, ah, imports-exports business
+ I wrote a big long organise-y e-mail when the thought occurred to me, and created illustrative examples, rather than flapping uselessly at it.
+ I responded promptly to another e-mail that required actual brain from me.
+ I ate a lot of really, really tasty food. (Stem ginger ice-cream with pear and wild berries crumble! Sweet potato houmous!)
+ ... and if we ever leave a legacy/it's that we loved each other well: yes, thank you, Indigo Girls, that will do nicely as something for me to aim for. (... and so we're okay; we're fine...)
+ I have wonderful, wonderful friends, who keep an eye on me and nudge me about self-care and generally look after me.
+ Other Housemates have all left for the break, i.e. I have the place to myself, i.e. it's actually okay for me to listen to music on the big speakers according to my (currently somewhat disastrous) sleep-cycle, rather than faffing around with headphones (because of the vagaries of my set-up, this involves crawling around underneath my desk).
+ I have got the kitchen into a state such that my bedder cannot reasonably have a snit about that tomorrow (not that this will necessarily stop her), including washing up after Other Housemates (ergo I feel very virtuous).
+ oh, go on, have another: my ridiculously fancy cologne (gift of boything), which I feel a little silly about loving this much but there we go, has been cheering me up all day.
+ ... I'm surprised every time I realise how well this exercise works, in terms of refocussing me on positives and reminding me about good & cheerful things in my life.