Made it back from B&Q, on the bus, with: one (1) water butt stand (which is a problem of its own, because the water butt is i. 210l and ii. full while also iii. it is raining); one (1) Large Terracotta Pot, in which to put the fig (which it now is!); one (1) packet of three (3) pot feet (because there weren't any terracotta Unterlagen in an appropriate size) (oh huh apparently standard German for that one is Untersetzer, The Things One Learns); and one (1) receipt, WHICH WAS A BIT TOUCH AND GO FOR A WHILE THERE, because I made the mistake of going back to B&Q, and the promised training... had evidently... not... materialised... and so I ended up quoting both the law and head office at the supervisor in question at length...

... but alas, this time I did manage to eventually talk them into actually taking payment from my card, rather than ending up walking off without paying again, which means I'm going to have to get my act together to write another complaint letter, in which I demand compensation at least equal to the cost of the items purchased...